Casualty of life or love

Guess who got their P’s today? YESSS, that’s right, this girl did! I’m so happy. P’s is the Australian licence which allows people to drive unsupervised aha. I went for my test today and was super scared that I’d end up missing it because I completely went to the wrong one and only had 20 minutes to get to the right place before I would’ve missed my test. Luckily enough, God was on my side and I made it and passed woooooo. On another note, yeahhhhh the late night drives. I mean I already go for them, but this time I can be the person to ‘legally’ drive ahaha. Life seems to be going good right now. I got an Op 4, my P’s, waiting on my enrolment for uni and now I just need a stable job. Being the person that I am though, I need to stop being picky because right now I can’t afford that luxury. I just need a job asap. Apart from that, my family situation is going great and my friends are still my life aha. New Year’s is soon and I’m excited. Maybe I should blog about my New Year’s resolution, my goals for next year and thing’s I want to do. That is definitely an option aha. Anyways, yes of course I went on an adventure tonight. Two of my best mates and I went for a drive to Botanical Gardens in the city tonight. It was beautiful, the moment was beautiful and everything about it was just beautiful. The lights reflected off the leaves and the trails which weaved its way through the gardens lead us to different lakes and a children’s playground. I don’t know about you, but no matter how old I get, I will never be too old to play on the playground ahah. We literally went wild, swinging off the swing sets and looking out into the dark sky. The stars illuminated the sky and the moon’s light embellishing my best friend’s face as he slowly swung back and forth on the swing. I love my best friends, but sometimes I get confused. When I say confused I mean as in confused as to how I love them. Sometime’s it makes me so sad, I get so cut up. I could marry this one friend, but he’s gay. I could actually marry him. Everything about him is so perfect. Ever look at someone and their imperfections make them so much more perfect in your eyes? Other times, I think that maybe we are only meant to be friends and that we were meant to be best friends so we could be there for each other always. We literally do everything together and I feel 100% comfortable with him. I lived with him for a bit once. He’s always there for me and I feel so protective over him. Like, I don’t want him to be with anyone, but I want him to be happy with someone because he truly deserves it. I’m not against gays, in fact, I see them like any other person. It’s just, I don’t want him to be gay. Is that selfish to say? It’s hard to express the things going through my mind with words, but I’m getting around to it. As you know, I am talking to this dude which is kind’ve weird at the same time, but I don’t know. I feel like sometime’s I just want attention from other people because I can’t get that attention from the one’s I want it most from? or maybe I’m just looking for something that they’ve all experience… Love? even if it’s just puppy love. All of them have been through it and I’ve always been the one to the side… with no one aha. As soon as I get into a guy, I can drop them like that as bad as it sounds. I don’t invest much and I grow tired of the same dude. I need someone exciting and I don’t know aha. Is this how life works? Are these the issues you read about in books or see in TV shows because if that’s the case, I don’t want to be apart of it. My other best friend placed a sheet over this seat thingo and the three of us lay there under the stars talking once again about our teenage dramas and so on. On the way to the car, we spoke about super powers and who’d have which one ahah. We said Tylah would control how people feel pain and could easily numb it as well because of her personality ahaha. She’s a closed off girl who keeps everything inside. If you’d met her in real life, you’d understand. Paryse would have telekinesis because of the beautiful brain she has. Charlotte would control emotions because she feels everything. She could literally see a random on the street crying and she would begin to cry too because she feels everything so much aha. Right now, I’m unsure as to what my super power would be and Will’s super power. Maybe in the future, I’ll come up with powers which would suit us. I’ll let you know when I figure it out. When the three of us reached the car, we drove to Mt Cootha and met up with Tylah and Flip and just chilled out looking over the city of Brisbane which mind you is exquisite at night, especially from mt cootha. After that, we drove to hungry jacks. Drag racing occurred, of course ahaha. We wouldn’t be teenagers if we didn’t do that. We grabbed some food from hungry jacks and all sat there laughing and joking. I’ve got footage on my instagram and memories to last a lifetime. I want to be happy, plain and simple and right now, I guess I am happy to an extent. Am I a casualty of life or love?

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